Sorry for pulling a Don Draper on the sewing-blogosphere and just disappearing… A lot has happened in the past few months and I’ll do a little bit of explaining, and then hopefully I’ll be back to sewing soon!

I got a couple of very sweet comments over the last few months asking if everything is ok or if something happened. Nothing terrible happened, I’m fine now, just a bit of a “quarterly-life-crisis” and a “seamstresses-block” of sorts.

I quit studying biology, because after only a short time I realized that a job in that field is not going to make me happy, and I need to be in an environment where I feel inspired and I can create things. This wasn’t an easy step, as I always just kind of assumed I would go into science since that’s what I was good at in school, and it felt like I was letting myself down by quitting. I know I could’ve gone through with it, I know how to study and get good grades and all, but just studying for 5 years for the sake of studying would not make me happy.

Then at the same time as I was dealing with the whole “what do I want to do with my life” I also had some other personal issues (in short: someone I thought I could count on to be there for me and understand and support me just dropped me, among other things), and it took alot of time for me to learn to like spending time with myself again. Sewing felt impossible during this time and I also didn’t want to push it, I decided to wait until I felt like it again.

So after a month of just being at home, spending time with family (in Switzerland and the States), I did hair and make-up for the musical group I was in last year and the year before, did (and am still doing) the costumes for a theater piece my friend is directing (opening night is next saturday, yikes! not too much sewing involved though, mostly looking for the right clothes and buying, it’s cheaper too…), visited London for a long weekend with a friend (started collecting hats…), got a job at a jewelry store, visited my friend studying in Paris and a few other things I probably forgot (like spending a ton of money on etsy). I’ve decided to take 1.5 years “off”, to just work (feels good to be making some money!) and figure out what I want to do. I’m thinking of going into fashion design or costume design, or maybe even acting, but I’m trying to keep an open mind. And who know’s what’ll happen in the next 1.5 years? Maybe I’ll decide I don’t want to study at all?

And I’m feeling better. I still have mood swings where I suddenly feel no motivation to do anything at all, but I also have phases where I feel like being creative and doing something (like rearranging my room!), and in general I feel more stable and emotionally independent.

For now (starting after the opening night of the theater piece…) I’m going to spend my weeks like so: Monday – Wednesday I’ll have time for my own projects (and occasionally jewelry store work) like blogging, DIYing, learning to drive, taking dance classes, baking, cooking (something I really want to learn to do well!), sewing and building an online shop (something I’ve been wanting to do for ages! So much planning to do first though), Thursday and Friday I work at the jewelry store, and my weekends will be spent doing whatever needs to be done (from finishing dresses to lounging around eating chocolate).

The only thing left to tackle right now is sewing! I do feel like sewing again, but the thought is also a little scary, I haven’t done anything for almost five months! Winter is almost over, meaning there’s no point in sewing the Winterdresses I planned. I think this is a good thing, because I need a bit of a fresh start now. So I’ll keep those dresses in mind for next winter, giving me space for new summer dress ideas!

This got a lot longer than I wanted but I guess it’s ok, after all, it’s been four months, almost to the day! I’ll finish this post with sketches I got via email about a month ago, thank you Moshe Asher!

Imgaes (c) Moshe Asher, 2012

So hopefully I’ll be back to posting dress inspiration and plans, and actual home made dresses again!

Thanks for sticking with me through the past “four dead months”.


10 thoughts on “Explaining…

  1. Lovely to see you back!

    I have been in your situation, and so have many people I know! I think the decision to pause studying (or perhaps leave it altogether) is one a lot of us experience, because for many people, it’s a big ask to decide what we want to do straight out of school! I remember feeling so confused about what I should do with myself, and I still am a lot of the time. I think you’ve made a sensible choice – I know for me just working and doing the things I love has brought me a lot of clarity about study and career ideas.

    I can’t wait to see your upcoming creations!

  2. oh i’m so glad your back. I had been checking your german blog and thought you had just dropped this one.. It is so great that you got the strenght to quit your studies and get a new start (reading your story felt like reading myself just some months ago- only the subject was politics-) Anyway I’m looking forward to see your new sewing projects and of course an online shop!!!! (that sounds purely amzing)

  3. You’re back! :)
    I don’t know if I’d have the courage to just quit in your place. I hope you make the best of your time and you realize what you want to do in your life.
    Will you post some of those diy projects and jewelry?

  4. Oh im glad that you are back! its better do something what make you hape than studying, but maybe you found some onother interesting study!

  5. Welcome back. I heard a little phrase yesterday which will stick with me forever and will hopefully help to confirm your gut feelings too. “Its far better to be rubbish at something you love doing, than to be good at something you hate” Life really is too short!! :-)

  6. Hi, there- I recently stumbled across your blog and holy bejeebers, this sounds like my life! I’m currently in the process of withdrawing from my college, where I was studying to be a history teacher and growing progressively more miserable about it. I’m working on transferring now to a school where I can study fiber arts (there are no fashion design programs in my state, unfortunately). I want to build my own business making clothes and maybe become a costumer. I think I might try to go to grad school for fashion design one day.

    So yeah, just throwing some emotional support your way. It’s always nice to discover other people in the same boat as you.

    • I haven’t been maintainging my blog recently, sorry for the late answer – I feel ya! In a way it’s annoying when you realize you’ve “wasted” time on something it turns out you don’t love as much as something else, but at least I realized before I spent 20 years… plus, now I know I really want this, and I feel so much more motivated to get where I want to be!

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